The beginning of my life was clear this time. I thank The Lord for giving me that chance. For months or should I say years and still to this day some of the thoughts of my past creep in and I bawl like a baby for things I did, said, didn't do or didn't say especially to do with my children.
But then, the Spirit in me takes those thoughts captive and I hand them over to God and confess to Jesus all my worries and fears and anxieties and ask Him to protect my mind and my heart as He promises. I also confess the sins of my people, this was we can all stay connected to The Lord and the pain goes away. It comes back less often now, the more I confess. I humble myself before The Lord God and thank Him daily for bringing me back to Him. I now stand before Him daily as a cleansed vessel ready for His every work. This is my miracle and this is what gets me up every morning. Thank you Lord Jesus!

In The Spirit

I can't believe that this is the second time I'm doing this. Last night I set up the exact same blog and couldn't find it today. I am going to let you know what I wrote last night. My name is Patty and I am an addict. I hated myself and didn't have that light in the tunnel. I could let you know my sob story and how and when and why I began to hide in drugs and alchol but this isn't at all about me. "And the Word was preached throughout the world". Three and a half years ago, I knew there was no hope for me and I, who has always been a believer in God, said to Him. Well, God, either you're real or not. I challanged Him to save me because I knew I had nothing to live for anymore. I laid in my bed and put as many painkillers and liquor as I possibly could into my mouth and simply asked Him if He was real. That night and the entire next day He couldn't have made it more plainer - Yes, He is real and alive in me and proved it to me beyond a shadow of a doubt. My body was shaking and I couldn't even talk to my 21 year old son except to repeat word straight from the Bible and spoke as the old prophets spoke. My son knew, as he also believed in God, that it wasn't me speaking but the Spirit inside me. My old person died that day and from then on I was a new person in Christ. I knew it - I felt it - I believed it- God spoke to me and said "CHANGE AHAB". I never even heard of that name until that night. When you are touched like that you know that it couldn't be anything else but your Creator. My life started that day.